We are having Timothy baptised on Sunday. Both Shawn and I grew up with religious traditions, but my early experience was vastly different from the direction we are going now. I feel good about our choice of churches--the people are so welcoming and loving, and the message delivered is in that same vein, a reminder to love our earth and her inhabitants rather than dictating what kind of person you're supposed to be. Last week we met with the woman who is going to perform the service, and her view is that this is an opportunity to welcome our little one into a bigger family. I really like that.
So, I'm not nervous about our decision. However, I am unquestionably anxious about the festivities surrounding this ritual, a ritual that is very different from what I grew up with. We're having the family over to our house afterwards, which means a divorced family on Shawn's side and my brother and his family and my mother for my side.
I'm nervous on many fronts. One, because I have no idea how the two sides of Shawn's family are going to interact, as all previous get-togethers have included more people as buffers. My family tends to be on the quiet side and I always have an irrational worry about whether or not they are enjoying themselves. I also worry about everyone else's expectations--are the food choices going to be the right ones? Should I do more? Less? Present are a number of people who can't imagine a meal without meat as well as others who are dedicated vegetarians--how to please everybody?
Shawn watches me with ten cookbooks open as I cross-reference and hope for some inspiration. When, in my fathomless insecurity, I ask him what he thinks, he says "Don't worry about it. Keep it simple." I wish I could take that to heart.
I need to trust that our family will be here because they love us and are here to help us celebrate this first rite of passage with our son. I need to let go of my control problem and realize that I can't help people get along, but they'll manage on their own just fine.
And I know EVERYONE will eat cake!
2 comments:
Cooking for a mix can be sooo tricky. In my family it is Dave's vegetarianism versus the people who are no carb. That leaves salad and dessert.
I guess I don't try to make things everyone will like, but try to make lots of different things that most people will like. Maybe you should like roast a chicken or something and then make everything else vegetarian.
oh. I just realized that maybe I should have said to like focus on your son and that this is your meal and all that....but I would be worried about this too!
Congrats!
AND!!! I got this awesome box in the mail with dilly beans and jam!!! THank you soooo much!!! You are such a sweetheart!
Lor, we are really only coming for the food. So....it had better be good! Now get back to work, you lazy shmo!
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